“How was your weekend?” I asked Dave as we crossed paths in the office hall Monday morning.
“Great,” he said.
“You do anything interesting?” I asked.
“Well, I actually had to put in a new mailbox. The old one was sunk into a huge block of concrete, so I rented a jackhammer.”
“You what?” I asked.
“I rented a jackhammer to break it out of the concrete,” he replied.
“I didn’t even know you could rent a jackhammer,” I said, truly amazed.
“Sure. It was about $60 for four hours — more than I wanted to spend — but it worked like a charm. I had the thing out in a few minutes,” he said.
“Really?” I said. “Have you ever used a jackhammer before?”
“Are you kidding?” asked Dave, who works in the technology field and has served in CIO roles, “Never.”
“So what made you think you could use a jackhammer without killing yourself?” I asked, desperately trying to figure this out. “Renting one never would have crossed my mind.”
“I don’t know,” he said. “I needed one, so I rented it.”
And with that, I had a whole new respect for Dave.
At the same time, however, I had a little less for myself. After everything I’ve done around the house — putting in new electric lines, fixing concrete steps, doing insulation and siding — my reaction to certain things is still: “Me, do that? No way!” I simply never would have thought of renting a jackhammer. I would have pictured the thing kicking up, stabbing me, and being featured on the 10 p.m. news.
“A Do-It-Yourself homeowner in River Vale, New Jersey, took things a bit too far yesterday as he impaled himself on a rented jackhammer. Let’s roll the video. Parents, you may want to send your kids into the other room.”
“Stu, I don’t why you can rent those things without a license.”
“That’s a great question, Brenda. I’m betting Mr. Guerra is asking himself the same thing tonight.”
But rather than my “can’t do” attitude, Dave had the right reaction to his challenge — “I have an issue; I need a tool to solve it; I can rent this tool; Let me go solve my problem.” And so he did, whereas I would have been stuck with the Leaning Tower of Mailbox.
“It’s not leaning over that much, honey. I actually think it looks better this way.”
So if someone with a decent helping of confidence and experience overcoming problems and challenges — someone who even relishes such things — still has the immediate reaction of, “I can’t do that,” why should we be surprised when those we’re asking to embrace uncharted territory express a similar feeling? Often, “I can’t do that,” should be interpreted as, “I haven’t done that yet, and I’m nervous to try unless someone with experience shows me how it’s done. I’ll give it a shot if you give me support.”
I, for one, am (again) committing myself to no longer saying and thinking, “That won’t work. I can’t. I’ve never done that so I’m not going to start now. That’s for professionals. I don’t have the tools so I can’t do it. I’ll probably kill myself if I do it that way. That’s out of my realm. That’s out of my league.”
Rather, I’m going to take my cue from Dave — examine the problem, determine what needs be done, and then move logically and sequentially towards accomplishing it. Get the tools, get the knowledge, and leave the fear to those who are content to be stopped by fear itself.
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